- Lilly Jay wrote an essay about her divorce for The Cut
- She is the ex-wife of Wicked star Ethan Slater
- Ethan Slater is now dating co-star Ariana Grande
We are holding space for this tea. Yesterday, Lilly Jay’s essay for The Cut was released titled: How Does My Divorce Make You Feel? The title was longer, but we’ll skip that for time’s sake. In the essay, Jay, a clinical psychologist, spoke about the impact her public divorce had on her.
Jay was married to Wicked star Ethan Slater from 2018, until their divorce in 2023. News broke shortly after that Slater was dating singer Ariana Grande, also his co-star in Wicked. Grande and Slater are now together.
Despite their very public divorces, Slater and Grande have shared their relationship a little. Grande was also married when she began filming Wicked. The pop star married real estate agent Dalton Gomez in 2021 after a year or so of dating. The internet was shocked when news of her divorce broke, and even more so when rumors about Grande and Slater started circulating.
Amid Jay speaking out, let’s examine how the internet reacted to the essay.
What has Lilly Jay said about Grande and Slater?
Jay hasn’t said much publicly about the situation since the news broke at the beginning of this year. Shortly after the divorce and new relationship news, she reportedly spoke to Page Six. The tabloid reported that the mother-of-one blasted the two Wicked stars, particularly Grande, where she said of Grande:“[Ariana’s] the story, really. Not a girl’s girl,” she continued, “My family is just collateral damage.”
At the time, Jay and Slater had an 11-month-old son, who is now two years old.
A source from the outlet also said that Jay “told Ethan and others that she only cares about protecting their child.”
Since then, her comments have been few and far between, and Grande and Slater have also chosen to keep quiet about their relationship.
They have been seen together publicly but have not directly addressed their romance or appeared close together during promo for the first part of the Wicked movie. Grande plays Glinda the Good Witch in Wicked, and Slater plays Boq.
What did she say about Grande and Slater in the essay?
Surprisingly Jay didn’t make too many disparaging comments towards her ex and his new relationship. She spoke about the impact the publicity had on her career and her son. However, the most shady part was pretty damning.
She writes: “No one gets married thinking they’ll get divorced. But I never thought I would get divorced. Especially not just after giving birth to my first child and especially not in the shadow of my husband’s new relationship with a celebrity.”
To provide some context, news of Grande and Slater’s relationship broke in July 2023. Jay’s divorce from Slater was made public when he filed that same month. As for Grande, the same applies, with her divorce from Gomez being announced the same month. However, in the case of the singer and Gomez, the date of separation was listed as February 2023.
Slater and Jay finalized their divorce in September 2024, while Dalton and Gomez’s divorce was completed by March. The divorce and the subsequent announcement of Slater and Grande dating were very public and intense for Jay at the time.
Slater says they focus on co-parenting their son. “I have come to believe that in the absence of the life I planned with my high-school sweetheart, a lifetime of sweetness is waiting for me and my child,” she wrote.
She added: “While our partnership has changed, our parenthood has not. Both of us fiercely love our son 100 percent of the time, regardless of how our parenting time is divided.”
Slater didn’t express bitterness toward her ex but discussed how Wicked’s promotion impacted her mental health. Jay reflected that her days with her son are “sunny,” but the days she can’t escape Wicked and its promo are “darker.”
How did the internet react?
The internet went into a frenzy about the essay. Jay has been relatively silent on Grande and Slater since the divorce…until now.
Sympathy for Lilly Jay
Many X users sympathized with Jay, who detailed her mental health struggles and moving to England for Slater and Wicked.
One user called Jay’s words “so powerful”.
"Some of what you loved most about your partner was actually your own goodness reflected back to you; it’s yours to keep and carry forward." -Lilly Jay
— Lady Luck (@SelOnTheBrain) December 19, 2024
so powerful!!!!! 🩷 pic.twitter.com/SmkuMCbHwd
Another commented on how “interesting” it was to see Jay’s perspective, as a clinical psychologist without anonymity because of the drama.
This is honestly so interesting. Not in any kind of messy way, just the unique experience of a clinical psychologist, whose role is predicated on a kind of anonymity in front of her patients, being involuntarily unmasked to the world https://t.co/Owb1pPlaJb
— jaseokundaye.bsky.social (@jaseokundaye) December 19, 2024
Slater and Grande condemnation
Other users, however, chose to focus on the timeline of Grande and Slater’s relationship. Many doubted the timeline that Grande and Slater appeared to display publicly. But again, those are only rumors.
Other users also condemned Grande and Slater.
Ariana and Ethan did not get dragged enough. Lilly Jay literally lost job offers because of the tabloids on top of her postpartum depression.
— Ⓥ (@lordellea) December 19, 2024
Truly scum of the earth
Arianators support Ariana Grande
Regardless of what the essay said, fans of Grande were quick to defend her and her boyfriend.
Another even implied Jay only wanted her “15 minutes” of fame. Wow.
Some users disregarded the essay altogether, choosing to focus on their love for the singer.
Who tf cares abt Lilly Jay when this human exists pic.twitter.com/A4mGAfivVK
— nass ❄️ (@drarisworld) December 20, 2024
Well, that is stan Twitter (or should we say X) for you.
